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Saturday, 8 October 2011

What a Racket!


Knock! Knock!

Good afternoon!  Have you found time in your life for Jesus?

Er... why would I need Jesus?

Because if you accept Jesus you will be saved!

Saved from what?

From pain and suffering.

I don't have any pain and suffering so what good would that do?

You will have pain and suffering if you don't accept Jesus!

So, If I accept Jesus he'll not cause me pain and suffering, otherwise he'll hurt me?

Jesus won't hurt you, he's kind and gentle, but someone else will...

Are you threatening me?

No! No!  Just offering you some friendly advice. Don't say you haven't be warned...

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Knock! Knock!

Good afternoon!  Have you got time for Big Ron?

Er... who's Big Ron?

Big Ron takes care of shop-keepers like you.  If you accept him your shop won't burn down.

But my shop isn't burning down.

It will be if you don't accept Big Ron's protection.

So, if I accept Big Ron, he'll not burn my shop down, otherwise he will burn my shop down?

Big Ron won't burn your shop down, he's kind and gentle - but someone else will...

Are you threatening me?

No! No!  Just offering you some friendly advice. Don't say you haven't been warned...

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Ring!  Ring!

Hello!  Is that the Police?  I'd like to report some protection racketeers....

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Posted by Rosa Rubicondior at 18:35

2 comments:

  1. Brilliant. Pascal's wager really is just the old "offer you can't refuse" applied to eternity.

    I've been a lurker on your blog for some time now, and I've really enjoyed your postings so far.

    ReplyDelete

  2. Very entertaining! haha at least Big Ron doesn't punish you for thought crimes!

    ReplyDelete

Obscene or obnoxious messages, preaching and advertising spam will be removed.

If possible, please provide a citation for any substantive claims or at least give a cogent reason why you accept it as factual. A quote from a book held to be holy by a minority of the world's people is not a scientific argument. Remember: your opinion is not an established fact unless corroborated.

Regrettably, due to persistent abuse by a loon hiding behind religion, I have reverted to moderating all comments. I will revert to open commenting if and when the abuser matures enough to behave like a normal adult, something which sadly he shows little sign of doing.

Additionally, because this loon has now degenerated to impersonating others by using their Twitter ID and address on comments, all such comments will now be routinely deleted.

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